Friday, August 15, 2008

You know how hard it is not to stare at breasts?

Actually, not too hard, but I wanted your attention.

I have mentioned my blessing and curse of being in a wheelchair, which puts me at eye level with gals' chests. But a new trend is developing.

Thanks to a confluence of fashion, bad hearing and a cute dog I have found myself recently on the receiving end of more than women want to show me. I assume.

The women, wearing loose shirts (the fashion), bend over to talk to me (the bad hearing) or pet Claren (the cute dog). The result is that all of a sudden my eyes are now staring down the inside of a loose shirt.

Being a gentleman, I don't look, but it is hard not to stare at breasts. Not that way. But just try obviously not looking at something. I feel like it is crystal clear what I am not looking at and I feel like a buffoon. It is like Austin Powers with Fred Savage's character "The Mole."

I swear, breasts are nothing but trouble.


Anonymous said...

They're not NOTHING but trouble, but they can be troublesome. There was a story on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me about a woman who consulted with engineers to find a way to harness the power of her bosom's motion to power her Ipod or cell phone, because she said that except for the 8 months she used them for breastfeeding they were useless to her.
see you in a few hours.

Matt said...

Were they successful?

Anonymous said...

similarly, I will not talk about what is close to my eye level both in the front and back. It is extremely interesting on the Metro! But of course, I keep my nose to my reading and don't look :-) (and I'm not saying this just because Tony is sitting right next to me)

Matt said...

Well, yuck! Who'd want to stare at that?

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