Friday, February 13, 2015

Fates be damned

Some friends and I have been trying to get together for months. We had a date, but one person got sick and another canceled. The make-up date worked for three of us, but the fourth was out of town. Then came the holidays.

We finally all got together last night, and it awesome as expected. This is a fun group.

But the fates again threatened to put the kibosh on diner. Luckily, I am a hoss, and I had my Advil.

At work that afternoon, I turned around in the bathroom. Let's just say the bathroom is not real open. But it has never been real open. I know this.

Anyway, as I was turning, my foot got caught on a wall that juts out into the restroom.before I stopped, my foot turned pretty sharply and quickly 90 degrees to the outside while the rest of my leg turned the other way.

When I was little, I could dislocate my leg at the knee. I don't remember how. I moved some muscle and my lower leg shifted grotesquely. It was gross and didn't hurt, so I enjoyed my odd party trick. As I grew older, I lost the ability, but I never forgot what it felt like.

This felt just like that with one exception: It hurt ...badly.

Everything from my calf to my groin -- ligaments, muscles, bones, etc. -- screamed in agony. I am glad I had just gone to the bathroom because I had nothing to empty when my system demanded: VOID. I spent several moments trying not to throw up and was covered in sweat.

I got back to my desk and called Mom to get her advice.  I didn't really want to leave work because I figured it might be better by the time I got home. In the end, I agreed because it still really hurt by the end of the conversation.

At home I transferred to the toilet. It felt like my knee was bending the wrong way, but it wasn't swollen. I napped for a while, then went to dinner.      

I hardly noticed it.

2 comments:

Patrick said...

Oh man! You let on none of this. Perhaps amazingly bitter cold winds distract from nearly dislocating a leg? I like that as an upside.

In other news, my favorite sentence here is, "Luckily, I am a hoss, and I had my Advil." You need to get a t-shirt that says, "I AM A HOSS."

Matt said...

Hossness aside,I can't discount the cold, the friendship or the Advil.


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