Lock-picking skills

If my speech-writing gig falls flat, I think I will become a bank robber.

I have seen The Town a few times and picked up tips there. Also, I know that good girls will fall for bank robbers even if they rob the bank where the girl works and then stalk her.

My wheelchair will handle the safes.

I am basing this on several recent run-ins in the bathroom at work. I have hit the big metal toilet paper holder with my chair. Each time, the locked box pops right open.

Safes can't be any harder, right?