A while back, my little sister and I were playfully arguing about whose fault it was that we did not get along in high school.
She blamed me and said I was essentially a mean nerd. I was definitely a nerd.
I blamed her for being a typical annoying high schooler and added that I was coming to grips with a deadly disability.
This is not the first time I have used this excuse. I told one of my nieces that even though her SAT score was higher than mine I was coming to grips with my disability. (Plus, she got to use a calculator and write essays. Just give me a 1600.)
Nobody buys this reasoning. My sister tells me to shut up and says I did not even know about Friedreich's ataxia. My niece says she took the test when her dad had cancer and she thought he was dying.
These are all valid considerations, but I think mine is, too.
An insecure, withdrawn teen trying to figure out why his body just doesn't work right.
Of course, I didn't think it was anything truly bad ... at least consciously. I had people I trusted tell me I was out of shape. My family thought I'd grow out of it. I was less clumsy than my brother. I never considered asking my doctor.
My sister was just one more thing in my life that I could not control. Maybe that is why I yelled at her for putting down the top on the convertible instead of waiting for me to do it.
Yes, it was mean and awful.
Yes, I was a jerk. The FA made me do it.
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3 comments:
If that niece is my daughter, she did not take the SAT when her dad had cancer, unless she took it in 7th grade.... Her little sister did tell me the other day, in jest I hasten to make clear, that she blames everything on Jim's cancer, including having to get braces. Blame away, I say.
so
JTG
Is it bad that I am searching my email for her emil making the claim
ha ha, totally normal behaviour. for us.
J
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