Hanging in there

Coach Hayes from high school gym class was a big proponent of neck exercises. Every time he took the class to the weight room he made sure we used the neck machine.

I was more than happy to work my neck because it was one of the few muscles that was not obviously weak.

All the neck work paid off today in the bathroom, when I held myself aloft with my neck ... at least until I fell.

I have a moveable bar that is horizontal to the floor near my toilet. I use it to pull myself up, which I did smoothly, but I was unable to reach my pants so I sat down again and pulled my pants up around my knees. Then I stood up and pulled my boxers over my delicate parts. But when I grabbed my pants, my legs buckles or something and I fell over the horizontal bar.

I had a good grip with both hands on various bars, so I recovered and found my chin resting on the bar.

I needed my hands to try to stand, not just to grip the bars. I did not want to fall, though. So I let go off first one hand and then the other while I held myself with my neck and chin.

I did fall, but not hard and it wasn't my neck's fault. I pulled myself off the bar but couldn't make it to my chair.

After that I sat on the floor, exhausted myself trying to reach my chair, and then called my sister for help.

The problem is: These things do not happen in a vacuum. Actually, they seem to happen at the same time.

So this happened, then later when I was getting in my chair for dinner, my lose pant slid down. Then when I was taking my pills, I kept hiccuping when I brought the glass of water to my face so I wound up splattering myself with water.

All of which seem funny, especially now, but when things like that pile up, it is all I can do not to cry.