Spam solution

You know all those spam emails that promise to make a certain male body part bigger? I am thinking about trying them.

Not for the ladies. Not a concern for one of the following reasons: a) I am as cool as possible with women and need no anatomic advantage, OR b) I can count on one hand the number of kisses I have received that were not familial in nature of from an insane drunk woman in the Greensboro airport.

No, my thinking has more to do with my fine motor skills. They suck, simply put. And it is easier to grab bigger things. I would no longer get lost in my pants and boxers as I try to get myself in position to pee.

I would also not fall over as I did in the bathroom at work today, well maybe. I think I just lost my handle on things and just sort of toppled, like a tree.

I managed after a bit to stand and get back to my chair.  I didn't get any help. One guy came in the bathroom, but he did not see a co-worker on the floor. Apparently.

So send the spam my way. What could go wrong.