Above and beyond

My knees squeezed tightly together are about eight inches across. The width between the superpole in my bathroom and the wall is about 9.5 inches. So, my knees do fit in that space.

I knew they could from Friday's incident, but I didn't think there was 1.5 inches of excess width. To be honest, I am kind of disappointed.

I came home Friday and went to the bathroom. My ankles, though, weren't feeling it and collapsed when I transferred. My butt landed on the very front edge of the toilet, and my legs went into the space between the pole and the wall.

I tried to slide backward onto the toilet, but my legs were wedged between the pole and wall, and I could not get them free.

I called for help, but no one seemed around, so I called my sister on the phone. She said she wasn't home but my brother-in-law was. And at that point, my almost 11-year-old niece edged tentatively into sight, a hand blocking her sight into my bathroom.

I told her there was nothing to see -- I hadn't pulled my pants down.

My niece then went and found her dad who got me onto the toilet, although I think it took more force than he expected, probably because my legs were jammed into that spot.

He also helped me pull my pants down because my ankles were still acting up when I was on the toilet and I wasn't able to stand up to pull them down.

For her bravery of coming into my room when I was in the bathroom calling for help, I am going to forgive my niece for ruining Thor: The Dark World for me by saying at the beginning, "I really like Chris Hemsworth." Who am I kidding, nothing could ruin a comic book movie.

PS. I am having a chicken-egg moment. Am I writing less because I feel bad or do I feel bad because I am writing less? I fear both are true, and I probably ought to do something about that.