Monday, March 5, 2018

Surviving a temple blow

When I was younger, I thought a blow to the temple would kill you.

Today, I learned this was not true.

Sadly, I lessened this first-hand.

I was sitting on the toilet, and my arm was on the grab-bar for stability. The lights stayed on, but my arm didn't. It fell off the bar, and my head -- temple first -- flew into the metal box that holds toilet paper. Fortunately, the corners are rounded.

I checked for blood -- none -- picked up my hearing aid and went about my business.

But this wasn't even the worst injury of the day.

I rammed my left leg into my desk. I debated barfing -- it hurt so bad --but decided to just go about my day.

I survived, although when I got home and changed pants, there was blood and a swollen patella.

A bad day.

Friday, March 2, 2018

Good uncle. Brother? Eh.

The lawyer at the estate planning meeting yesterday informed me that the point of it was to make life easier for my people after I kick it.

This explanation came in response to my comment that my sister, my sole beneficiary, would probably share my estate, but honestly I didn't care because I'd be dead.

He actually made me think about what I wanted.

I decided to divide it all between my nieces and nephews. That sort of screws over the one brother with no kids, I realize.

Mom and I were having a bit of an argument about the cost. It was more than I anticipated. I said I better die quickly so this pays off. She said the opposite: I need to live a long time to pay it off.

I guess whenever I die will work then. As long as it's not before I sign everything.

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Matty's estate

I am going to a lawyer tomorrow to make out a will/trust/whatever.

Apparently it is not enough to say my niece gets all my comics; other than that, have at it.

Filling out a form on my assets also reminds me that it might not be wise to have my sole beneficiary be my medical power of attorney. Will she be checking the value of my IRAs when she decides whether to pull the plug?

However, to might be overdue to set something up, especially since the lights went out in the bathroom again today, this time right before I was about transfer to the toilet.

Monday, February 26, 2018

Above and beyond

I work with a guy who goes out of his way to help me.

It does me no good to tell him I don't need him to do something because he can't hear.

Today, he was getting off the elevator when I was getting on.

The people getting off the elevator with him didn't hold the door for me, so he pushed the button to open the door. Then he followed me onto the elevator to push the floor. We have to "unlock" the floor with our ID cards, so he did that, even though the doors closed and he had to ride up. Then he got off the elevator with means opened the office door even though it meant he missed the elevator.


Saturday, February 24, 2018

Ruining my mood

When I left work Wednesday, I held a bunch of papers on my lap, Fame carried my lunchbox, and a bag full of my empties (Gatorade bottles from several lunches) was precariously hung on my chair.

The empties would stay in unless I hit something.

Unfortunately, I hit the side of the elevator doors on the way out, spilling two bottles. This caused Fame to drop the lunchbox.

Fortunately, a co-worker riding the elevator got off the car when she saw my spillage and collected the bottles and handed Fame the lunchbox.

Thanks, I said, really thinking, wow, that was really nice for someone I don't know.

It soon became clear how nice.

Wednesday was crazy windy, and when I turned to where Dad was waiting for me, my bag of empties blew open. One bottle fell near me; one blew into the grass, unreachable for me or Fame.

Three people passed without helping. One guy was right behind us and couldn't have failed to see the spillage. It put me in such a rotten mood.

Finally, Dad came up from the van and got everything. I was left longing for my nice co-worker.

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