This disability card doesn't work right

It's rare that I use my disability to try to get something extra.

Sure, I use handicapped parking spots and for Bruce Springsteen concerts I buy accessible seating, which are usually easier to get than other seats. But the handicapped spots are for me and I need accessible seating.

It's not like I ask to skip to the front of the line waiting for a cab on a snowy night at the airport. I do jump to the front when asked, like the cab manager did at Dulles that night years ago, but I don't ask.

Yesterday was vendor day at work so as I walked out with Claren at lunch, I passed lots of tables with pens, key chains and other tchotchkes. But Volkswagen had T-shirts.

Granted, I just got three kick-ass T-shirts, but I decided I wanted one. I figured they were for people who signed up for a test drive or something, but I would say, "Trust me, you don't want me driving your cars." Then we'd all laugh and I'd get the shirt.

Not quite.

I asked "So what do you have to do for a shirt?" The guy said just fill out some stuff. I said "I couldn't really write so ...," thinking he'd just give me a shirt.

No, nothing.

I can't even play the disability card right.