My dog is such a jerk

Claren'll bark like crazy when we are getting ready to go out.

And then she will run and grab her ball and lie down chewing it. Sometimes, she will tire of chewing and just lie there with the ball near her mouth ... until she hears the click of my chair, suggesting I may be moving toward the ball, then she grabs it.

If someone else, anyone really, comes over, Claren drops the ball at their feet and barks at them to throw it.

Honestly, I just want to know what she is thinking.

I think she thinks she is too cool to play with her dorky dad. If she does, she is a total phony. I left her home when I went rock climbing Friday and she just moped around without me.

Mom suggested that Claren thinks it is too hard or dangerous for me to get the ball. This theory loses water when I do grab the ball in her mouth, and Claren tries to tug my arm out of its socket to get it back.

I know I'll never know. I'd love it to be No. 2, but I know my dog is just a bad egg. A bad egg I love but still a bad egg.