I'm sorry

You know how in It's a Wonderful Life, George comes home on that day Uncle Billy lost the money and when Mary asks what's wrong, he says, "Another big red-letter day for the Baileys"; then he yells at his kids, apologizes, tries to kill himself and is saved by his guardian angel?

Well, I promise not to try to jump off any bridge. I only have 4% power in my chair anyway -- I had to turn it off and on multiple times just to get enough power to get up the driveway. I couldn't get to a bridge.

I also won't dive into a cold river because I suspect my guardian angel would not be up to saving me.

Like George, I also have some apologies to make. I am sorry that:

• I run into walls and scrape molding off. It wasn't on purpose. I didn't realize I was touching the wall.
• I have roped people at work into helping me move my stuff to a new desk. I hate that I can't do it.
• Just after getting a moving helper, I tried to move a desk tray and dropped it. It was heavier than I thought.
• I laugh when I do something stupid or successfully stare down death. The alternative of weeping is much less pleasant.
• The cleaning staff will think there was a raucous cocaine party at my desk because of all the white powder on the floor. Actually, I just spilled three packs of sugar.
• I drive poorly in my wheelchair, particularly backward.

Finally, I am really sorry that doing anything these days -- even writing -- just seems too damn hard.