Sunday, July 19, 2009

I am not a slob

As I was getting ready to go the White House today, Mom said, I need a little bit of your brother to rub off. This was further proof that my brother and I, while having a ton in common – including Friedreich's ataxia – have very different approaches to life.

We both know, for example, that the bats above Bolg's army are “like a sea of locusts.” We know that Cutter's soul name was Tam. And that “showoffs always get hurt.” (No link for this one. It was just something a friend shouted to his brother who was showing off his skateboarding skills in the St. James parking lot. He turned back to answer his brother and slammed into a fence.)

What Mom was wishing was that I had just a little of my brother's sartorial splendor.

The invite to the private tour of the White House said no shorts or jeans. That takes away about 100% of my weekend wardrobe during the summer, but I figured to wear some dockers and a golf shirt. See, the key word for my wardrobe is easy.

I wear a coat and tie to weddings and funerals. The only buttons I allow on shirts are ones I don't have to do, so polo and golf shirts remain open. I wear a lot of T-shirts. I feel I am being pretty stylish when a friend tells me I look like Michelle Obama because my T-shirt is earth-tone argyle. Not that I want to be First Lady, but if I did ...

My brother, though, yikes; his dress routine wears me out. He wears contacts. Glasses suck, but they are a small price to pay for not having to touch your eye. Next he puts on a button-down shirt, then a tie, and that's just for lounging around at home on Saturdays.

OK, I am kidding. That is his work outfit, but when he is home he still wears more elegant clothes than I would even consider. I still haven't bought him a T-shirt from the Bruce Springsteen concert even though he and his wife gave me tickets because I am just not convinced he'd wear it. I gave him a T-shirt a few Christmases ago that said “Monkey Crossing,” which is awesome, trust me, but I have never seen him wear it.

I am not a slob, but it is a pain to get dressed up, letting others button your shirt.

I did just that today to go on the tour of the White House from a friend who works there. What I liked most was all the paintings. I'd never get any work done because I'd want to sit and stare at Washington crossing the Delaware or the other art that line the walls. It felt like a library, and I wanted to whisper. I was disappointed only that Claren and Bo the First Dog did not meet.

I considered letting Claren pee on one of the little gardens out front that have bushes, just so we could leave our presence at the White House. But then I remembered what some old-timer (Bear Bryant, I think, but I see it attributed to Jim Brown, Walter Payton and others) said about scoring touchdowns: Act like you've been there and will get back. Plus, they'll be pulling Claren hair out of their rugs for decades at least.


Anonymous said...

I think it bears noting that T's sense of style mysteriously blossomed when he met and started dating S. Just saying....besides your flash t-shirt makes you noticeable...remember?

Anonymous said...

I like the list of things that you and Tony know together. I was just thinking about this difference between the two of you the other day. Sometimes he even wears cuff links. This is why a kilt would be so great for you. It's dressy, it's casual, it's comfortable, it's --dare I say it-- distinctive.

Anonymous said...

2 words.... Sharon Stone.

Kilt + Matt = bad idea


Anonymous said...

now that I am at home most of the time, I daresay that I wear more T-shirts and your brother and I almost feel guilty wearing a T-shirt and pants! Actually, if I wear a shirt with a color it is better for hooking up the microphone so I tried to stay away from the T-shirts. But they are nice and comfortable :-) And I Must Say That all of Tony's namebrand clothing comes from the sale rack. I may like style, but it has to be up for a good price!

Tony said...

Dude, I wore the Monkey Xing T-shirt yesterday! In case you don't believe me, it's in the dirty clothes pile now.

And besides, we all know, that it's better to look good than to feel good. know I'm joking, right?...

Tony said...

Oh...and I think it was Mikey who was showing off on the skateboard, not Joe.

Anonymous said...

one of my favorite sayings is "I may feel like crap but at least I look good!"


Anonymous said...

I so love our family!

xo to you all.

Matt Trott said...

Going mostly in order:

I prefer to be noticeable because it is not like I am going to fade into the wallpaper with a big honking wheelchair and a beautiful dog. And no chick is gonna change me unless she is cute.

Unlike Sharon Stone, I'd wear an undergarment; however, I agree no no no to kilts.

You wore the Monkey Xing, but could one see it? How many layers were on top of it?

And I started thinking it was Mikey after I wrote it.

Finally, I dig the saying "I may feel like crap but at least I look good!" But I always look good! That is the whole point.

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